


Let Me Say Goodbye

by aloha_cowgirl



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Ficlet, M/M, Sad Ending
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-16
Updated: 2019-02-16
Packaged: 2019-10-29 20:54:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17815349
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aloha_cowgirl/pseuds/aloha_cowgirl
Summary: Castiel has to try and save Heaven. Dean isn't ready to say goodbye.





	Let Me Say Goodbye

“Goddammit, Cas… you can’t do this to me. Not now.” Dean’s voice was low, nearly a whisper, scrubbing his hands over his tear-streaked face as he sat on the edge of the bed. He felt as though his chest had collapsed, a black hole where his heart had raced just hours ago.

Cas sighed, closer to tears than the angel had ever felt before. “I just wanted to tell you goodbye. I don’t– I don’t know what will happen when I get back to Heaven. So let me. Please. Just let me say it.”

Dean sobbed, refusing to look at the angel. He couldn’t. If he looks at Cas now, it’ll be goodbye, and that just isn’t an option. He can’t lose him now–now that he knows. And he does.  _He_   _knows_. The doubts that once overshadowed his feelings for his friend are long gone, and he’s finally,  _finally_ , seeing clearly. He needs Castiel. He loves him.

“Cas, please. I need you. I can’t lose you now. I can’t–” He can barely keep his eyes open with the sting of the tears when Cas’s hands slide along his jaw, thumbs swiping over Dean’s cheekbones. Dean melts into the warm touch.

“Dean.” Cas’s voice wavers over the name slightly, emotion clearly finding its way through. “I have to do this. I have to go back to Heaven. Without the angels, Heaven will collapse and the souls will be lost to the veil. And I can’t let that—”

Dean sobs once more, allowing his sadness to pour out of him, pride be damned. But he knows Cas is right. This is bigger than Dean and Cas. Bigger than the start of a  _whatever this is_ , though whatever it is is definitely something substantial.

“I wish it could be different,” Cas continued, lowering himself to his knees to be face to face with his hunter. “I wish it didn’t have to be this way. Away from you is the last place I want to be.” He swallowed hard before allowing the words, “I… I love you, Dean.”

Overcome with emotion, Dean wrapped his hands in the lapel of Cas’s coat, pulling him close and kissing him deeply. Cas’s hand wrapped around the hunter’s back, holding them together for what would never seem long enough.

“I know,” Dean finally said with a sad puff of laughter as their lips just barely separated. “I love you, Cas.”

The pair moved together to lay side by side on the bed. Neither said a word as they lay together, holding one another tightly. They lay silent for a long while, and when Dean’s breaths evened out Castiel kissed his forehead with a gentle pulse of his grace ensuring Dean would sleep in peace through the night.

When Dean awoke in the morning, the morning sun seemed pale and cold. Cas was gone.

 

[ Inspired by the song [Oil & Water ](https://youtu.be/2rLLMCRpdMI)by Lee DeWyze]


End file.
